Saturday, March 28, 2015

Seeking Havok by Lila Felix

Her life is just as messed up as her name.

All she wanted was a friend---one that knew her and not her circumstances. She needed somewhere to call home. Hers was an open door for countless men looking for the services her mother offered them. She camouflaged herself against lockers and blackboards to avoid the stares and whispers at school. 

And then she found Cal...and Fade.

Cal lives like Frankenstein, rising at night to work and just trying to make it until dawn. He avoids most relationships, afraid of the things he will be asked to do. He moonlights as Fade, a radio station DJ who spends hours counseling his peers on their troubles. It was all mundane until Jocelyn called the station.

Cal and Havok pursue a friendship. 

Jocelyn and Fade pursue a relationship beyond the confines of the radio waves. 

But when Havok disappears, Cal will find that Havok has been guarding a lifetime worth of secrets. And when Fade and Jocelyn’s all night phone conversations cease, he finds a link between them he never saw coming.

I was hooked from the beginning.Got wrapped up in who Havoc and Fade were and who they created themselves as for each other,even if they didn't know that's what they were doing. I love Havok's sarcastic personality and her strength to persevere even when the worst of the worst situations presents itself.I saw that coming right before it was confirmed and it didn't prepare me for what I felt when I realized this could and mostly is happening in my town and it just made it all the more real. The characters are real and believable.I laughed and I cried throughout the story.
Havok just wants someone to see her as other than her mother's daughter but she can't free herself from her mother's grip,at least not yet.She may be 18 but she's still in high school and has no other place to go,her only hope is to get accepted into college. But being as stubborn as she is and narcissistic as she says she is,she can't see that escape from the life she loathes and accepts as what it is has been there right in front of her.
Fade has made a name for himself in the radio world that has followed him into the real world. Convinced he'll never find a girl who wants to know the real him instead the radio version of him,Cal settle for a friendship with a girl who intrigues him abut keeps him at arms length. All he wants to do is get to know the real her. Havok let's little buts of her life slip into there conversations but quickly shuts down after that. Unbeknownst to him,he actually knows more than he realizes. But by the time he puts the pieces together it may be to late to say any resemblances of a relationship,including friendship.
Tired of all the petty people complaining about their lives taking for grant it what they really have,Jocelyn calls in to Fade's show giving everyone a new perspective of how some people really live and it's not in some foreign place no it's right under their noses in their own town. Fade's mind is now clouded by two girls who plague him.One he knows her deepest darkest secrets but not her face and one he sees but no nearly nothing of her.
It all collides in a heart stopping conclusion that'll have you on the edge.When Havok disappears Cal will move Heaven and Hell to find her but what he finds may be more than either of them expected.

My favorite quotes:
"I opened the apartment door a crack to see if it was hot or cold outside. There was no use in listening to the weather when you lived in South Louisiana. You just got up in the morning and stuck your head out of the door, it was the best policy." ~Fade 

"She could never be a pink lady—‘ she was too pure to be pink.’ Gotta love some Rizzo. Ok, ok, pay attention— she might sneak a halfway decent question your way." ~Havok

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